In Australian democracy there is one rule more important than the ‘separation’ of church and state.
It’s the maintenance of a vast gulf between sports and politics.
When families, yobbos, fans and the odd mob of uni students dressed in matching t-shirts and wigs head off to the footy, the last thing they want is to be used as props in a political campaign.
Enter the AFL. And the soulless elite who want to cast their bureaucratic pall over every aspect of life as we know it.
In their wisdom, they’ve decided to break this golden rule and throw in religion as well.
Let me give you example one: jobs for the Muslims.
You can see the full description of this taxpayer-funded job here, while Malcolm Turnbull talks up his Islamic pork-barrelling in the Facebook post below.
This job pays $34,000 a year and there are ten positions on offer. Suffice to say, if you want one you must have an Islamic background and you’ll be directed by Islamic groups to ensure that the AFL is ‘halal’.
It’s wonderful news for 2% of Australians who watch soccer anyway.
I’m not quite so sure whether the people who normally attend, play or support Australian rules football – the Jonesys, Maccas and Smithys – will be so pleased once the AFL’s ‘communication strategies’ change.
The clock is now ticking down for pork and alcohol free diversity games, Eid matches and quotas of Islamic draftees.
It might take a few years, but then again, in just a few years we’ve gone from a nation that put a pig on the field to commemorate Plugger to a nation that screens for suicide bombers at the MCG.
If you tried repeating the porky play now, you’d probably be arrested and then hit with a religious vilification proceeding.
Vale the Aussie larrikin, murdered by diversity in the name of love.
Now let me give you example two: GayFL
This Saturday night St Kilda will wrestle Sydney. Players from both teams will swan about in rainbows and, for good measure, the umpires will flap their garish flags in our faces as well.
Gay, according to the AFL, is about as good Islam. And it’s not just a personal thing, but one that the plebs must celebrate publicly lest they fall foul of the Thought Police.
The Chairman of the Sydney Swans, Andrew Pridham, had this to say about the ‘Pride Match’ the other day:
“Clearly there are gay footballers playing AFL, statistically it’s pretty obvious.”
Actually, not one single AFL footballer claims to be gay. So, clearly and obviously, Andrew is just making his statistics up.
And statistically, it’s not surprising that no AFL footballers claim to be gay. That’s because the facts show homosexuals are more likely to suffer from illnesses like HIV, which means that they are less likely to be elite athletes. In fact, they are about 500 times more likely to get the bad news from the doctor than other blokes.
According to the Kirby Institute, 85% of people acquiring new HIV infections are homosexual. Proportionally, that means about one in ten homosexual men are afflicted with this disease. And as a recent Kirby Institute study found that a majority of homosexual men have multiple partners (with the largest category being those with six or more in the last year), one can only be somewhat surprised that this number is not higher.
And the AFL is celebrating it all this week.
The good news is that the rainbow flag waving will probably be a more efficient way of getting the Islamic community to pay attention to the footy than the Federal government’s ‘diversity’ measures.
It’s just that this interest is likely to come with some negative baggage. And before the AFL goes full burka on the gay, it might want to consider these facts.
Now there’s an interesting coincidence…
Finally, as the AFL is such a welcoming organisation and so demonstrably tolerant, you might cast your minds back to March this year and this banner.
In order to show how ‘diverse’ it is, the AFL boss, Gillon “Sharia Rainbows” McLachlan, stated that the guys who unfurled it should be banned from attending future matches.