Investigate the Mincing Poodle’s hack

It was probably her greatest contribution to Australian politics. On 23 February 2009, then Deputy Prime Minister Julia Gillard rose to her feet in parliament and stated:

“In a choice between macho and mincing I would have gone for macho myself.

The leader of the Opposition faced with the choice of a doberman or the poodle has gone for the poodle.”

And that is how Christopher Pyne obtained his nickname.

The ‘Mincing Poodle’ is back in the media for all the wrong reasons. Sometime in the night after Australia voted for homosexual marriage, his Twitter account mysteriously ‘liked’ gay porn.

At first glance, it would seem that the Minister for Defence Industry was putting into practice what Defence preaches: gender bending and diverse sexualities.

Indeed, there’s are a whole army of committees, networks, support groups and diversity commissars within Defence at the moment planning for the next Mardi Gras and Defence’s official participation in a parade of pornography down Oxford Street early next year.

As such, ‘liking’ homosexual pornography is a clear demonstration that one is onboard with the new cultureless agenda. And a Minister ‘liking’ it would also explain why Defence is focused on these things instead of capability.

However, Christopher Pyne has made it clear that he was not joining in the action online and a tad early. Instead, he claims that his account was hacked:

Taking Pyne at his word, it seems that some nefarious online vigilante with the ability to hack his way into the accounts of the powerful then used his enormous skill on the Defence Industry Minister’s Twitter feed to ‘like’ a single, solitary video of two men getting it on.

Consequently, the general attitude to this ‘claim’ appears to be:

However, two people have come rushing to Pyne’s rescue.

One of them was Bill Shorten. He ‘helped’ the Liberal Party’s resident ‘GetUp Liaison Officer’ by claiming that he believed Pyne was hacked but that no investigation was necessary.

I don’t think that Bill’s help really helped all that much.

The other, of all people, was Cory Bernardi. And he rightly pointed out that Pyne’s claim of hacking was serious and must be investigated. After all, he is the Defence Industry Minister:

And Pyne’s claim must be taken seriously. The risks to Australia’s security are too great to have this swept under the carpet. And so are the risks to Pyne’s reputation: a failure to get to the bottom of this ‘hacking’ will leave Australians with the reasonable conclusion that Pyne is a liar who is living in the closet and using our military as a shield for his own personal failings.

We wouldn’t want that, would we…unless an investigation would do nothing more than confirm it.

And we wouldn’t want that either.

So I’ll leave the last word on this to Mark DiStafano, who first noticed the explicit ‘hacking’:


In other unrelated news, young players on Twitter should probably be aware of some of the features of the micro-blogging network to avoid embarrassment.

It is very easy to post something on the wrong account.

All you need to do is have two accounts. You log into the first and post away there. You then open a second tab on your browser and log into your second account and start madly ‘liking’ all the gay porn you can find.

And then, after a few banana daiquiris celebrating society’s acceptance of rainbow love, you check back in on the work account to see if they’re any messages praising the liberal Liberals for their part in the destruction of Australia’s concept of family.

Nup. The bloody rainbows don’t even care. They’re still going to vote Labor anyway.

So you flick back over to the other browsing tab for one last video forgetting, however, that you remain logged into Twitter as a cabinet minister and not as ‘Mr Bojangle’s Cat’.

And then when you ‘like’ that video the next 24 hour news cycle is suddenly rewritten to be all about hackers.

Very embarrassing.

Author: Bernard Gaynor

Bernard Gaynor is a married father of nine children. He has a background in military intelligence, Arabic language and culture and is an outspoken advocate of conservative and family values.

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  1. Seriously!! If Pyne who is the Minister for Defence Industry claimed that he was hacked, would raise a question on how reliable is his security provided that his position involved ultra-sensitive information! If both Bill Shorten and Malcolm Turnbull “turns a blind eyes”, that is nothing but a treason! This is highly worthy of an independent investigation as Australian would demand answers!

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  2. Sarcasms unintended but, perhaps, unavoidable…
    Some of the expressions by CB in the video and BG above and would soon be trivial court cases (insult in between-the-liners)
    Well, may be I see black?

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  3. I hope the “Mincing Poodle” doesn’t get picked up by the RSPCA because he’ll be neutered in no time. But maybe the Mincer would like that sort of thing.

    It could have worse, he could have been caught pictured up to his wrist in a toy Poodle.

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  4. Mincing Poodle or Muddled Moodle? Definitely not a good like for the Minister of Defense Industry or his Twitter Acct. Sounds like those Russian hackers are up to their tricks.

    Hope he knows how to use the ‘unfriend’ option on social media.

    The alleged hack should be investigated. Hope the Russians will put a funny message on the answering service at their embassy. Watch that space.

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